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I said to my daughter, who was six at the time, “Look, I know you’re upset about this change of plans, but we can work something out,” to which she replied, “I’m choosing to be angry at the moment. Now I am going to go to my room and slam the door behind me.”

This level of self-awareness blows most adults off the charts.

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One thought on “The Zen of Childhood

  1. I am loving your blog. I am particularly intrigued by your spirituality and how you raise your children. I love the awareness of your daughter. I feel like I am a similar parent and I definitely have similar outlooks and goals as you, but am perhaps less refined or centered properly in what I *should* be doing, and I would love to come closer to a lifestyle where I don’t feel the need to discipline my kids (they do get time outs and get sent to their rooms, more than I care to admit. when it was just my daughter, her first years were full of no time outs and no yelling on anyone’s parts, and yet somehow it’s come to this). Yet, I don’t want them to be out of control. It’s easier to reason with my 7 year old, who may be able to articulate a little something like your daughter without crazy outbursts. My toddler, however, becomes physically violent at times (and he’s strong) and very emotional at not getting his way. It’ll be simple things, like not getting to watch a movie he loves. I keep thinking I spoiled him (I tend to give them what they want as long as I don’t see any harm in it), and wondering where he gets his hitting from (I used to think if I didn’t hit, they wouldn’t learn to hit, but it’s happened anyway– one of his first words is “kick”. I think his older sister, despite her peaceful upbringing, has played too rough with him perhaps).

    I want them to be more in touch with their inner selves and I want to be more tolerant of their emotions even when it’s inconvenient. Usually I am good at this, but they can be so demanding and so needy so often that I get to a point where I’ve had enough and need to do things *my way*, for myself. Is there something I’m doing wrong when everything turns to chaos, even to the point of physical altercations?

    PS– I realize this is an older post. 🙂

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